A red bicycle

Every once in a while I venture in deep water.
With Rochelle at the helm, I follow daring Friday Fictioneers and I plunge, inspired by a photo of hope, courtesy of Jan Wayne Fields.
The idea is to write a story in 100 words. Or close.
Let the light shine.

the-boat-and-miss-liberty2

A Red Bicycle

I’m five. I never cry.
I’m in the closet again. Mama gimme the gun.
You be quiet, y’hear?
If he finds you, you shoot him baby, OK?
The Man come for his money. He come every day when mama’s not sick.
He yellin’ and hittin’  when he says she’s keepin’ some back.

She’s screamin’. She’s beggin’.
But he don’t quit.

I gotta pee.

Don’t wanna hear’em.
It’s dark.
I can’t see nothin’ but I close my eyes. And I see water, and birds flyin’, and I’m ridin’ a red bicycle…

I gonna have to wash my pants.
Mama be mad.

About emmylgant

Cloud watcher and dreamer sometimes wise, often foolish, but I am what I am.
This entry was posted in Friday Fictioneers, Life and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

40 Responses to A red bicycle

  1. PapaBear says:

    The reality of too many dark and troubled families. This was a really nice job of verbally picturing and describing a horribly contemporary topic, Emm. It’s also so very different from your usual ! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • emmylgant says:

      Yes it is dark. I saw the contrast between our ideals and our practices as a society and ran with it…. Yes, that’s not usually what I do. But you know I like to stretch every once in a while 🙂

      Like

  2. Hyperion says:

    I’ll depart and say, I think it was brilliant. It’s a believable scene, it could happen. It has happened. The authenticity brings me inside the closet and I feel emotions not just words. That’s what writers and poets do when they do it well. Well done, Em. I FELT that.

    Like

  3. trentpmcd says:

    Such a sad tale. Very well told.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. mickwynn2013 says:

    Harrowing but you know it happens. As said above it makes you both angry and sad. Very powerful writing

    Liked by 1 person

  5. So sad and heart wrenching

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Get me out of that closet NOW. So vivid and painful to read.
    Tracey

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Vinay Leo R. says:

    Oh dear. That must have been a sad childhood. 😦 It reflects in the write. Well written.

    Liked by 1 person

    • emmylgant says:

      Hi Leo,
      Thank you for your input, it’s much appreciated.
      And the compassion you express, is honorable.
      For my part, I only played hide and seek in the closet thank goodness. 😉

      Like

  8. Dear Emmy,

    I can only echo what has been said. So very sad. As you said, the child grows up, what will he pass one? Well done in so few words.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    • emmylgant says:

      It is an awful story, but not rare ( well maybe the gun is).
      If the young soul survives, what indeed can he pass on?
      I am pleased that the tale worked. Thanks for taking the time for it Rochelle, I know you are under pressure :-).

      Like

  9. tonyprance says:

    Bloody good Emm …..no feathers here !

    Liked by 1 person

  10. That is a truly awful tale! Poor child. Obviously very well written to provoke such strong emotions.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. michael1148humphris says:

    This was so well put together and described. Well done

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Lynn Love says:

    Dark and powerful, I have to agree. Love the voice you’ve used, the frightened, bewildered kid worried about the state of his trousers. Love how we all write such different stories. Very nicely done

    Liked by 1 person

  13. This made me both angry and sad… I think your tale could be a sequel to mine actually.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Sandra says:

    Very sad. Very powerful. You captured the voice perfectly.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Suzanne Richmond says:

    Great writing my friend. Subject is as you say ‘deep water’… You captured the essence of the situation beautifully… as per wonderful you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • emmylgant says:

      Thank you Sooze. It’s too easy to destroy a little soul who can’t defend itself. Then if they survive their childhood, we wonder how a human being can become a monster….

      Like

  16. ceayr says:

    Jeez, Em, this is rip a heart out stuff.
    Superbly done, of course, but so so sore.

    Like

  17. neilmacdon says:

    Wow! That’s dark and powerful

    Liked by 2 people

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